Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Mom Fails

I make no claims at being a perfect mom. Quite frankly, I screw up on a regular basis. Most moms do. Oh, let’s be real. ALL moms screw up on a regular basis.

Most of the screw ups are pretty minor, like the time my daughter was sitting on my lap and suddenly lurched over my arm and fell head-first on the floor. Or the times (yes, plural, sadly) that my son has climbed into his own car seat and I’ve forgotten to strap him in. Mom Fail, but no harm done.

Occasionally they’re a little more serious – or at least, a little more traumatic (for either me or my kids). Like the time that my son, who always slept through the night, woke up crying in the middle of the night and I let him cry for half an hour until I checked on him and discovered that he’d thrown up all over himself. Mom fail. Or the time I gave my daughter a bottle of milk in the car and when she dropped it on the floor, I picked up and gave her what I assumed was the same bottle of milk but what was in fact a bottle that had been left in the (extremely hot) car since the day before. I will omit describing the results, but whatever you’re imagining, it was worse. Spectacular Mom Fail.

Sometimes the screw-ups could have tragic (or at least serious) consequences, but don’t (thank God). Like the time I wasn’t watching my son very closely while he was eating his dinner and he informed me that he had stuck a bean up his nose. A few hard nose-blows cleared it out, but we could have easily ended up in the emergency room. Or the time I didn’t realize that he was able to climb up the table in his (3rd floor) bedroom and he knocked out the screen and started throwing books out the window. He wasn’t hurt in the least, but if I had taken a few more minutes to realize what was going on, he could have been much worse than hurt. Epic Mom Fail.

There are lots of different reasons for my various mom fails. I’ve failed one child because I was dealing with the other. I’ve failed a child because I was paying attention to something else. I’ve failed a child because I was sleep deprived and not thinking straight. I’ve failed a child because I just didn’t know any better. But I’ve never failed a child because I didn’t care, or because I didn’t have the best of intentions.

So despite all those fails, I still consider myself a pretty good mom. After all, I try hard to keep my kids safe. I try hard to teach them about the world around them. I try hard to teach them to be polite, and curious, and generous, and to have common sense. And most of all, I love them. I love them more than anything in the world, more than my own life. What more could any child ask of a mom than that? I’d call that a Mom Win. An EPIC Mom Win!

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