Cast of Characters

I have now lived in my new house for a little over a month, and in that time I've gotten to know many of the birds and critters that hang around. In fact, I've gotten to know them so well that I've named many of them. Let me share with you some of the characters that visit us regularly.

Lenny (and Jenny, and Benny, and Kenny, and Denny), the Bunnies

I can't take credit for naming the bunnies; my kids came up with the whole "-enny" naming scheme at our old house. We love watching the -ennies while we (and they) are enjoying dinner outside. Most of them are impossible to tell apart, but there is one who loves to flop down in the cool dirt at the side of the house, as well as several clearly younger, smaller bunnies, including the cutie in the video above.

Larry, Moe, and Curly, the Blue Jays

I'm pretty sure that Larry and Moe are Mom and Dad, and Curly is junior. Curly has a tendency to whine a lot, and he is also a bigger klutz than the other two combined (and that bar is set relatively high). They're all a little too big to sit comfortably on the suet feeder, so they have a habit of frantically flapping their wings while eating in an attempt to keep their balance. Larry and Moe teeter on the edge of control but Curly has fallen into the rhododendron on more than one occasion.

Captain Hook (aka "Cappy"), the Hummingbird

Most of the hummingbirds won't put up with another hummingbird at the feeder while they're eating, but Cappy takes it to the next level. Before he eats at the feeder, he sits on top of the hook it hangs from and surveys the area, as if daring other birds to come near. Should another bird approach while he's at the feeder, he chases it away, twittering furiously. And he doesn't just chase it a few feet away, he zooms around the yard following it for several minutes. He is clearly the alpha bird and makes sure everyone knows it.

Toby, the Groundhog

Toby is just a little guy, as groundhogs go, which makes me suspect he is a baby. He wanders around the back yard, hoovering weeds and clover like it's going out of style. He trundles around on his chubby little legs, staying as near as he dares when chased, cheekily peeking back at the aggressor (me) from his perch on top of a big rock at the edge of the woods. So far he's been quite well-behaved, not attempting to eat our herbs or tomatoes or even the flowers in the garden. As long as he only munches on the lawn and the weeds, I'm happy to have him around. Hopefully he's smart enough to understand that we'll leave him in peace as long as he stays away from the good stuff.

Stumpy and Wallenda, the Chipmunks

Stumpy was actually the very first animal I named at the new house. There were probably dozens of chipmunks that we saw on a regular basis, zipping back and forth between the pool yard, the gardens, and the woods, but Stumpy was distinctive because of his unusually short tail. Chipmunks, like warthogs, have a hilarious tendency to hold their tails straight up in the air when they run, so Stumpy was noticeable and identifiable even when moving.

Wallenda, on the other hand, may actually be more than one chipmunk, but since I have never seen two chippies attempt his acrobatics at the same time, I am inclined to think that Wallenda is a single individual. His distinctive behavior is his ability to climb the shepherd's crooks that the feeders hang from, and to acrobatically climb down into the feeders and gorge himself on the seeds inside. I have seen a number of chipmunks attempt this maneuver, but they all chicken out when they reach the top of the crook, or else they attempt to jump from post to feeder but fail miserably. Only Wallenda has displayed both the nerve and the physical ability to complete the maneuver.

Flower, the Skunk

Flower is the one animal on this list that I have never seen in person. But he (or she) makes an appearance several nights a week on our security camera, trundling around the pool yard in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning. And I assume he (or she) is also the cause of the occasional divot in the lawn that appears overnight. We have a terrible Japanese beetle problem, so Flower is welcome to eat as many adult beetles and grubs as he (or she) can hold. 

Rambo, the Attack Robin
I have yet to capture Rambo on film, mostly because his best work takes the form of sneak attacks. Rambo hates blue jays. I mean, he HAAAAAATES blue jays, with the fire of a thousand suns. He will not allow them to have anything to do with the bird feeders while he is in the yard. If he catches sight of them, he screeches and dive bombs them and chases them out of the yard. He simply explodes out of nowhere and scares the bejeebers out of them (and often me). Even when there are three of them and only one of him, he does not hesitate to attack. I know that robins are territorial but I've only seen them exhibiting this behavior against other robins. Maybe Rambo is color blind and thinks the jays are robins; I just don't know. All I know is that Rambo is the Snape to Larry. Moe, and Curly's Harry, Ron. and Hermione.

I'm sure that over the course of time, I'll get to know more of my furred and feathered neighbors. I just hope they're all as funny and fascinating as the ones I've met so far!

If Birds Were Celebrities

The other day, my husband and I were laughing at the antics of some blue jays at our bird feeder. The jays like to eat from the suet feeder, but they're much larger than the usual birds that use it, so they tend to crash land and swing crazily for a few moments. I commented to my husband, "They're big, friendly, good-looking lugs. They're like the the golden retrievers of the bird world." Then I thought for a moment, and I added, "If they were people, they'd be Gronk."

If you're not from New England, or if you're not a football fan, you might not recognize "Gronk" as former New England Patriot Rob Gronkowski, who is known for not only being an incredibly talented athlete, but also for being a hilarious, friendly goofball. He's handsome, he's clearly smart (at least in a certain way), but he's a big goof. He is, basically, a blue jay.

Blue jay = Rob Gronkowski

So, if blue jays are Gronk, what are the human equivalents of some of the other birds I frequently see at my feeder? Let's see...

The titmice are the most frequent visitors to my yard. They have a tendency to loudly make their presence known as soon as they arrive. They nearly always sound angry or out of sorts. They rarely arrive alone; they seem to move about in large families. One of their most distinctive features is their unique "hairstyle," a little crest that sticks up at the back of their head. They can get a little grating after a while, but somehow you still feel the need to watch their antics. What celebrity comes to mind who also fits that description? I have to go with...Kate Gosselin.

Titmouse = Kate Gosselin

Next, we have the hummingbirds. They are flashy, sporting bright colors and sparkly highlights. They immediately take charge of the situation and drive out all competitors wherever they go, sometimes to the point of being bullies. Sometimes they disappear for a while, but they always come back, often staring at nearby humans as if to make sure they're the center of attention. Also, they don't eat much. They are, without a doubt...Tyra Banks.

Hummingbird = Tyra Banks

One of my favorite visitors is the cardinal. The cardinal rarely makes a fuss, but somehow it's always noticed. Cardinals generally travel as a mated pair, with one of them clearly outshining the other sartorially and attracting more notice because of its bright plumage. The human equivalent of cardinals is, no doubt...Prince William and Kate Middleton (but with the genders reversed, obviously).

Cardinals = Prince William and Kate Middleton

One of the more rare visitors to my feeder is the Carolina wren. It is one of the birds that I hear frequently, but see much less often. It has a gorgeous, melodic voice that I would gladly listen to for hours, and despite its generally drab plumage, it's quite lovely to look at. Its human equivalent is...Adele.

Carolina wren = Adele

Although they don't care for the bird feeders, one of my most frequent visitors to the yard is the robin. Easily recognized by most people, the robin is known for its parenting style and will fiercely defend its young and its territory, often in a strident and unpleasant tone. Its food choices are thought by many to be rather unappetizing. The robin is...Gwyneth Paltrow.

Robin = Gwyneth Paltrow

One of the shyer and more reticent birds in my yard is the woodpecker. Starting off very nervously, the woodpecker takes some time to get comfortable with being watched. It is somewhat awkward until it feels comfortable (and sometimes even then), preferring to let others go first and lurking in the background whenever possible. Its human counterpart is...perpetual second banana Stephen Tobolowsky (aka, "Hey, it's that guy!").

Woodpecker = Stephen Tobolowsky

What do you think? Am I right, or am I right??

What I Have Learned About Birds

In the past month in my new home, I have probably done more bird-watching than I had in the prior 50 years combined. I have a large arched picture window outside my family room, with three feeders on hooks just outside the window: a hummingbird feeder, a suet feeder, and a seed feeder. I have spent countless hours watching the birds, trying to identify the less familiar ones, and even working on matching the songs and birdcalls I hear in the trees to the actual birds landing on the fence and the feeder. It has been quite an education. Here is what I've learned about the birds that have visited:

1. Titmice like to holler. They hardly ever land at the feeder without screeching their presence. They are not stealthy birds.
2. Ditto for bluejays. They crash-land on the hook then yell for a while before they think about eating.
3. Baby bluejays have super whiny voices.
4. Titmice travel in packs. It's incredibly rare to have a single titmouse visit the feeder without another arriving either with it or immediately afterwards, and often 3 or more.
5. Finches and titmice are good sharers. They are happy to eat at the feeder with other birds there, of the same or different species.
6. Woodpeckers are shy, and will wait until all the other birds are gone before coming to the feeder. They also usually sit on either the hook or the feeder for several minutes, looking nervous, until they get up the courage to eat. This occasionally includes sliding down the pole, ever-so-slowly, pretending they meant to do that.
7. Robins HATE bluejays. Like, HAAAAAAAAATE them. The robin will chase the bluejays out of the yard if they dare to approach the feeder while the robin (which, by the way, does not eat from any of the feeders) is in the yard. Even when it's one robin to three bluejays.
8. Bluejays are giant cowards.
9. Hummingbirds are tiny little bullies. They will take on any other bird that's nearby, from another hummingbird to multiple bluejays. They are not good sharers.
10. It's difficult to distinguish individual birds of most species; however, occasionally one individual will exhibit a distinctive behavior. Although some hummingbirds eat while hovering and some land on the rail and stand while they eat, we have one male who sits on top of the hook for a few minutes before and/or after he eats, as if establishing his sovereignty. He will not only chase away other birds, he will follow other hummingbirds around the yard, hollering at them in his squeaky little hummingbird voice. I have dubbed him "Cap," which is short for Captain Hook. It suits him.
11. Hummingbirds SQUEAK?!?? Yes, they do. Usually while flying, and nearly always when chasing another hummingbird.
12. Carolina wrens like to hang around near the feeder and sing, but rarely come to eat.
13. Goldfinches will sit at the feeder for 5-10 minutes at a time while they eat, never leaving their perch.
14. Titmice grab a single seed, fly to the top of the hook, hold the seed with their feet, peck it open and eat it, then FLING the seed hulls into the air before returning for another seed. They will do this for several minutes at a time.
15. Cardinals only graze on the ground, never on the feeder. They rely on the messy birds to knock seed onto the ground for them. Fortunately, there are plenty of messy birds.
16. Bluejays attempt to eat from the suet feeder, but they are so large and clumsy that they set the feeder to swinging and have to wait for the movement to stop so they can eat. After several attempts, they usually give up and eat the bits that have fallen into the rhododendron bush below, which provides much firmer footing (as well as some degree of concealment from the attack robin).
17. Hummingbirds only eat from the hummingbird feeder.
18. Bluejays only eat from the suet feeder.
19. Titmice prefer the seed, but will also eat the suet.
20. Woodpeckers prefer the suet, but will also eat the seed.
21. Hummingbirds like to hover in front of the window and peer inside, either before or after they eat. If you are outside, they will occasionally do the same to your face.
22. Everybody hides when the shadow of the turkey vulture passes overhead.
23. Chickadees are heard much more often than they are seen. Ditto for cardinals.
24. Hummingbirds can be very small. Dragonflies can be very large. They are easily confused, until they move. Hummingbirds occasionally drive away dragonflies. Not sure if they are also confused and think the dragonfly is another hummingbird, or maybe they're just jerks. I'm leaning toward the latter.
25. Much like children, birds often hang around and pose adorably right until you get your camera handy, at which point they either leave or present you with their least flattering side.

Oh - and one more thing to know about birds: Watching them is good for the soul.

Bird Cocktails

It's been quite a while since I've written a cocktail blog, so I figure I'm about due. And since I've been spending so much time in my new house watching the birds at my feeder, I thought it might be fun to do a blog on bird-inspired cocktails! Here are a few of my favorite feathered visitors and the delectable concoctions they inspire.

Woodpecker

Believe it or not, there is actually a cocktail called the woodpecker, and it is one of the simplest cocktails imaginable. Simply pour some vodka over ice in an old-fashioned glass and add a few dashes of bitters.

Hummingbird

The hummingbird cocktail is also relatively simple: In a tall Collins glass with ice, stir together 2 oz champagne or sparkling wine, 1-1/2 oz St. Germain, and 2 oz club soda. Garnish with a twist of lemon.

Chickadee

The festive Chickadee Cocktail is created by putting two scoops of rainbow sherbet into a highball glass, then adding 4 oz coconut rum, 2 oz vodka, and 6 oz Sunny Delight orange drink (do not stir!), and adding a cherry for garnish.

Titmouse

I couldn't find a cocktail called a Titmouse, but believe it or not, there is a kind of vodka called "Two Titmice," and one of the recommended cocktails on their website was called the "Ta Ta Martini," which is something like a Cosmopolitan. In a shaker over ice, combine 2 oz Two Titmice vodka, 1/2 oz triple sec, and a splash of cranberry juice. Strain into a chilled martini glass with a sugared rim and garnish with a lemon twist.

Great Blue Heron

The Blue Heron cocktail is made by muddling 4 basil leaves and 2 teaspoons of sugar in an old fashioned glass, then adding 1 oz sparkling water and 3 tablespoons frozen blueberries and muddling again. Add some crushed ice along with 1 oz lime juice and 1-1/2 oz rum and stir. Garnish with a few blueberries on a skewer and a sprig of basil.

Blue Jay

The Blue Jay is a simple shot that combines equal parts vodka, blue curacao, and milk. Shake over ice and strain into a shot glass.

American Goldfinch

Although there is another extremely complicated cocktail called the Goldfinch, the American Goldfinch cocktail is simpler. In a cocktail shaker over ice, combine 4-1/2 oz bourbon, 1-1/2 oz dry curacao, 1 oz lemon juice, and 4 oz apple juice. Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass rimmed with brown sugar.

Robin

There are a number of robin-themed cocktail recipes out there, but the Robin's Nest looked the most festive and refreshing to me. In a cocktail shaker over ice, combine 1 oz vodka, 1/2 oz creme de cacao, and 1 oz cranberry juice; shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass and garnish with a cherry.

Cardinal

With its striking coloring, it is no surprise that the cardinal has a number of cocktails named after it. The least obscure and most appetizing version I found is made by combing 1-1/2 oz rum, 1/2 oz maraschino cherry liqueur, 1 teaspoon triple sec, and 1 teaspoon grenadine in a cocktail shaker over ice, and straining into a cocktail glass. Garnish with orange peel.


Happy bird watching - and drinking!