Derby Hats, 2022

Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not a big sports fan. I will occasionally watch a figure skating or gymnastics or diving routine during the Olympics; I'll even sometimes hang around for a couple of plays of a high-stakes championship game like the Superbowl or the World Series. But more than about 5 minutes' worth and I lose interest. Which makes the Kentucky Derby - which has been called "the most exciting two minutes in sports" - the perfect sporting event for me. 

What makes it even more perfect for me is its grand tradition of hat-wearing. Anyone who knows me also knows that I am a big hat fan. And a small hat fan. And a fascinator fan. And...well, you get the picture. So although this year's Derby race was exciting even by my standards, the fashions in the stands were even more exciting. 

In case you missed them, here are some of the marvelous hats I spied on Derby Day!

This black-and-white hat uses a modified kettle brim hat as its base - a true kettle brim turns up all the way around, not just at the back as this hat does. I love the ornate curled feathers combined with the loops of tulle. 

This amazing hat goes for size in all dimensions! From its oversized, floppy brim to its enormous rosette, to its explosion of white feathers and eucalyptus sprays, everything about this hat is deliciously overdone. 

I love the visual balance that this hat achieves by offsetting the asymmetrical broad brim with a pair of fabulously long dyed pheasant tail plumes, as well as the interesting textures in the rosette, ribbons, and feathers setting on the hat brim. 

Simple but charming, this flat-brimmed hat uses bold polka dots and a few delicate splashes of red to catch the viewer's eye. 

Fascinators have grown both more popular and larger at the Derby over the last few years. This one uses a ruffled cobalt blue organza base that matches the wearer's dress, then adds matching small feathers and contrasting vivid yellow lilies and a huge yellow ostrich plume. 

This relatively simple hat base features an asymmetrical brim and a wide deep coral ribbon with bow, then explodes into white calla lilies and peacock feathers to add both height and whimsy. 

This attendee opted to decorate her hat with kitchen accoutrements in addition to a few peonies: a grater, utensils, an oven mitt, apples, and spices. I'm not sure what she was planning on making, but I'd like some!

Another oversized fascinator that opted for height, these huge red flowers are topped with a few feather tips on curved wires.

This much smaller fascinator combined a scarlet lily with a few tufts of white feathers and a few long sprays of white forsythia.

An elegantly side-tipped fascinator, this lovely hat uses a soft orange flat base and adds orange and hot pink silk flowers to both sides of the upper portion. Another hat that was perfectly color-coordinated with its wearer's outfit. 

Bigger is better with this lovely wide-brimmed, slightly asymmetrical paint blue linen hat with blush pink edging, topped with hugely-oversized slightly deeper pink lily petals and cobalt blue peacock feathers, plus a few whimsical twisted pink "stems" just for fun. 

The small black base of this fascinator blends into the wearer's dark hair to make it look like a flock of brightly colored butterflies has just landed on her head!

I love the shape of the brim of this gigantic hat, which dips down to allow more room for its giant pale pink rosette and mauve and yellow narrow curled feathers. 

This cocktail hat (which differs from a fascinator only in that its base is the shape of a traditional hat, although both are clipped to the hair or to a headband) looks like a large fern inside a blue planter, echoing the colors of the wearer's ombre dress. 

I love the subtle variations of shades of purple and blue in this large fascinator made from tulle and feathers. 

Although this fascinator looks light as air, its long feathers and tulle ruffles swoop high and away from the wearer's face like birds!

This classic take on a fascinator includes a large rosette, a single upright feather, and a charming birdcage veil. 

This lovely light turquoise hat's brim was so large that the milliner pinned it back with a giant deep blue hydrangea, then filled the top with artful swoops of tulle and a tall ostrich feather. 

This small ice-blue fascinator filled its space with a large flower base and an umbra of curls of ribbon and feather tips.

I was - appropriately enough - fascinated with the shape of the base of this fascinator. It looked like a giant pink Pringle topped with ribbons, flowers, and feathers instead of onion dip.

Simple and elegant, this giant pink Audrey Hepburn style hat was topped with a cluster of thin feathers that looped back toward the brim.

This tall fascinator combined a Carnevale-esque color scheme of feathers with a large jeweled brooch.

Another fascinator with a fascinating structure, the triple-teardrop-shaped base and orange curl extended to the side reminded me of Chihuly glass sculptures. 

The huge rosette on the brim of this hat was so oversized that the wearer barely fit in the photograph! But it was nicely balanced with some smaller (but still huge!) flowers on the opposite side. 

Lest we forget about the men, the most whimsical hats of all were worn by men, including this white fedora which featured a whole array of horses racing around the brim and a champion perched on top!

This man's hat wasn't even really a hat, just a stuffed horse's head, complete with purple silks and a pair of peacock feather tips. The jockey goggles' were a nice touch, too.

This man needed to use his hand to help support his hat, which was an impressive model of Churchill Downs. 

This gentleman combined a traditional top hat with a large horse figurine (who, by the way, is wearing an elegant top hat itself), a cardinal, and a few red roses, which match the color of his elaborately styled and dyed beard. 

This attendee put safety first by using a hard hat painted with a horse racing scene as a base, and topping it with a wreath of roses and a pair of (spinning!!) horses. 

I don't know about you, but these people inspire me to up my hat game for next year's Derby!