Nailed It!: Week 14 Check-In

Double score this week: I hit my goal of 148.4 pounds, which was also the 30-pound mark. Yay for me! Somewhat coincidentally, I also got a new cell phone this week and lost my weigh-in history from my phone app. But that's okay, because I'm starting a new goal: losing 12 more pounds to reach 136. 

My two goals both have a very practical basis: they're set points that I know my body sticks at for a while. I had two babies in my early forties, after which I stayed within a couple of pounds of 148 for nearly a decade; and throughout my 30s, when I ranged from 132 to 136. I would say that 148 pounds is both a healthy and - as I have just proved - an attainable weight for me. And 136 is an even healthier and probably also an attainable weight. If I find I can't get there, though, I'm not going to beat myself up. Staying below 150 for the rest of my life is my overarching goal; if I can drop another 10 or 12 pounds, all the better, but not a huge deal if I can't make it. 

Yesterday was also my 16th wedding anniversary, and my husband and I went out to dinner with our kids, our niece and nephew, and our niece-in-law-to-be, which meant an excuse to dress up. Which meant an excuse to try on all the dresses in my closet that I've been hanging onto for years in the hopes of fitting into them again (or at least, looking good in them again). Instead of the 2 or 3 nice dresses I've been able to wear for the past few years, I had my choice of a dozen or so! I opted for an old favorite, a cherry red, high-waisted, clingy surplice dress. In a size 8. And I don't mind saying that I ROCKED IT.

But more important than looking good, I am FEELING good. I mean, think about it: thirty pounds is like two Thanksgiving turkeys. Imagine going for a walk carrying a full-sized turkey under each arm, and then putting them down. How much lighter and stronger would you feel? My kids are both BSA Scouts, and when they go backpack camping, the recommendation for maximum pack size is 20% of your body weight, so a 150-pound person should carry a pack that weighs no more than 30 pounds. Now, hiking while carrying a 30-pound pack is a lot. I had basically been "hiking" through life with a full backpack, and now I've taken it off. 

This Monday is Patriot's Day here in Massachusetts, and part of our local celebration is a reenactment of the historic battle in Concord, the famous "shot heard 'round the world." A regiment of Minutemen from our town marched to the battle, a 7-mile trek, and our local reenactors recreate that march every year, accompanied by my son's Scout troop, the Isaac Davis troop, named for the captain of that regiment, who was the first officer to die in the American Revolution. My husband and son have made that hike a number of times, but this year my daughter and I plan to join them for the final 4+ miles. A year ago I wasn't comfortable with the thought of keeping up with a bunch of teenage boys for 4 miles, but now that I've "dropped my backpack," I think I can do it.   

That's why I'll be happy even if I never lose another pound. I've found a place where I feel good, I'm eating healthy without depriving myself too much, and I feel like I could continue eating this way for good. Could I drop another fifteen or twenty pounds if I really had to? Probably. But I've found a balance between looking and feeling healthy, and enjoying the foods I love. And that's a great place to be. 

Quote for the Week:

I'd rather eat pasta and drink wine than be a size zero.

- commonly misattributed to Sophia Loren (who did say "All you see I owe to pasta.")

Not a size zero, and gorgeous

25-Pound Milestone: Week 12 Check-In

Oops, I missed posted last week. But it's been a solid couple of weeks. I broke out of my plateau and have continued losing, albeit a little slowly. 

I passed the 25-pound loss mark, which is particularly impressive when I confess that I've been loosening up my food restrictions a little. But that's not necessarily a bad thing; it's serving as a kind of test to see how it feels to move from a weight-loss regimen to a weight-maintenance regimen. 

Which isn't to say that I'm ready to be done. Although my original goal was to get back below 150 pounds - which feels reasonable, since after my kids were born my weight hovered around 148 for quite a few years - I'd be delighted to be able to continue losing weight until I reach about 136 pounds, which is what I weighed throughout my 30s, before my kids. 148 is a healthy and reasonable weight; 136 is a healthy and near ideal weight. I'm not convinced my body is willing to get to and stay at 136 pounds, but at this point I'm not convinced that it isn't. So when I reach 148, which I expect will happen in mid- to late April, I can decide if I'm willing to continue with the strict diet until I get down to 136. 

I do have moments of cravings, especially during this past week of cold and rainy weather. Nothing makes me want to drink mug after mug of hot cocoa and to stuff my face with comfort foods like mashed potatoes and gravy, carb-heavy casseroles, and every form of bread ever invented like dreary grey skies and rain. But I'm continuing to focus on truly enjoying the foods that I do choose to eat, eating slowly and savoring each bite, and evaluating my choices in terms of trade-offs and caloric value (no wasted calories!). It does mean that I allow myself a few extra calories when there's something that I really, really want to eat, but it also means that I think about each choice before I make it. 

I continue to feel better: I have more energy, my clothes fit better, my joints ache less, my blood pressure is down. The positives by far outweigh (ahem) the negatives. I don't regret giving up anything. So I'll stick with it as long as it feels this good and I'm in a healthy place. I can do this! I AM doing this! I WILL do this!

Quote for the week:

"Eat clean to stay fit. Have a burger to stay sane." - Gigi Hadid

The Plateau That Wouldn't Die: Week 10 Check-In

At this point, I feel a little like Sisyphus: I'm still working hard, yet I'm not seeing any results. Fortunately, unlike Sisyphus, I haven't lost (gained) much ground, I just haven't gained (lost) much, either. In other words, I'm still on a plateau, yoyo-ing between 157 point something and just over 158 pounds. (That said, this morning I clocked in at a cool 156.2 pounds, so I'm hoping this plateau is ending soon. *knocks on wood*)

I haven't been overdoing it with treats, although I will readily admit that I've been tempted to have treats without sacrificing something else more this week than any week so far. 

One thing that has given me more of a positive outlook is that I'm starting to move from my winter wardrobe to my spring wardrobe, and I've been pulling out quite a few articles of clothing that I haven't been able to wear in a couple of years. It's like I'm going shopping without ever leaving the house! Lightweight pants that used to be too snug in the thighs, sheath-style dresses that may have fit but didn't flatter, short-sleeve tops that I can now tuck in. It reminds me that even if I never lose another ounce, I've made significant progress. I look better, and more importantly, I feel better. 

However, I'm continuing to seek support and inspiration from other people's weight loss journeys. For example, I came across a great article by Ree Drummond (aka "The Pioneer Woman"), who lost 55 pounds (!) over the course of one year. She had a list of 10 tips, many of which I found helpful, because either they reinforced something that I was already doing or experiencing, or they were new ideas that I wanted to try. Among the reinforcements were these ideas: 

• Starting with a strict diet doesn't necessarily mean it'll stay that way forever, or even as long as you're working on losing.
• Your body gets used to smaller portions so you don't feel hungry or unsatisfied after a meal.
• A little bit of alcohol is okay.
• Daily weigh-ins, although not for everyone, work great for some people (apparently including Ree and me).
• You don't have to completely ban any foods, just be reasonable about frequency and portion size.
• Trying different strategies can be helpful to find what works for you - or what combination works for you.
• Minimize wasted calories: sugary treats, anything I eat or drink because I'm bored or to be social rather than because I'm hungry, anything you eat without deliberate enjoyment or satisfaction (no mindless snacking directly from the bag!). This falls under my "trade-off" plan.
• Changing your diet is a long-term plan, not a quick fix that you can drop when you're done. 

And the new ideas that I'd like to try were:

• Even if you don't exercise in a formal sense, moving is important, even if it's just parking further away from the store or getting out of your chair and walking down the hall a few times a day. 
• Building muscle helps boost your metabolism, and you get the biggest bang from building up the biggest muscles; i.e., your legs and glutes. 
• Eat more protein and fewer carbs (especially sugar). 

One thing Ree did that I refuse to do is counting calories and weighing food. That might work for some people, but for me, it's simply a time-consuming chore that frustrates and annoys me, and one that doesn't provide a significant benefit. I know how much I usually eat so I can eyeball an appropriately smaller portion size. I know what in my diet has higher (or empty) calories. I can "common sense" my choices and get pretty close to what I'd be doing if I were weighing and calculating, but without the time and frustration involved. 

The good thing about these needed changes is that spring is here! For the past week we've had a constant stream of wild beasties in our yard (chipmunks, raccoons, opossums, skunks, red foxes, and deer), which is a sure sign that warmer weather is coming. And warmer weather is always an easier time for me to both eat lighter and get more exercise. A warm, sunny day practically invites me to go for a walk; the wider availability of fresh vegetables encourages me to make healthier choices; and the foods I'm craving are lighter dishes cooked on the grill with fresh herbs rather than heavy sauces or gravies. Bring on the salmon, summer squash, grilled chicken, fresh tomatoes and basil, green salads, and all the bounty that local gardens have to offer. 

I'm ready. 

Quote for the Week:

The only successful way to reach and maintain a healthy weight is to find what works for you. 

Another Plateau: Week 9 Check-In

This week has probably been the most frustrating week so far. I've been hovering around the 157 point something mark all week. I haven't really gained anything, but I haven't really lost anything either. 

But this is the benefit of having everything written down: I can go back and look at my eating habits for the week to determine if I've been falling off the wagon anywhere. And the good thing is that I haven't. Maybe a treat here and there, but generally balanced with giving something up another time. But the bad thing is that sometimes you can do everything right and your body just rebels and clings desperately to those unwanted pounds. 

I'm reminded of this meme: 

I come from a line of solidly built women. None of them were particularly overweight, they were just naturally plump. I was always more slightly built; I never thought about my weight because I'd always been able to eat what I wanted, exercise minimally, and still maintain a healthy - even slender - weight. So I figured I'd be one of the lucky ones who stayed slender with minimal effort even as I got older. Ha!  It became that much harder when I had children and hit menopause and the pounds didn't magically melt off any more. In fact, without changing my eating or exercise habits, the pounds crept on. 

But I know that persistence pays off, and that as long as I stick with my plan, the weight will continue to come off...eventually. And you know what? Even if it doesn't, I'm better off than I was. I look better, and more importantly, I feel better. 

A bad week is a bad week, not a bad month or a bad diet. So I'm going to try to shrug this one off. This week is a new week, tomorrow is a new day, and I'm still a new me - with better, healthier habits.

Quote for the week:
The road may be bumpy, but stay committed to the process. 

20-Pound Milestone: Week 8 Check-In

Eight weeks ago, I started a weight-loss program after I'd hit a lifetime high weight of just under 180 pounds. As of today, I've passed the 20-pound mark, weighing in at a cool 158.2 pounds. This is less than I've weighed in the past 5 years!

My goal is to get back below 150 pounds. After my kids were born (in my early 40s; I was a late starter), my weight settled in at around 148 pounds for nearly a decade. I feel like that's a healthy, attainable weight, although I'd love to drop another 10 pounds after that, to get down to my pre-baby weight of 136-138, which was where I was at throughout my mid-to-late 30s. But I'm considering that more of a "nice to have" than a "have to have;" I'd love to get there but I won't be disappointed if I discover that reaching and staying at that weight is too onerous. I'm trying to work with my body, not against it, and it's important to me that I don't feel like I'm overly deprived or overly focused on food and eating habits. So I'm continuing to play it by ear. 

For now, I feel like I can stick with where I'm at, but I'm also comfortable with loosening up my restrictions now and then when I need it. I still stop and think about tradeoffs and consider how much I really want something special, but I don't let myself feel guilty if I decide I want a dinner roll or a glass of wine or a handful of tortilla chips, even if I don't give up something else in exchange. It's all about balance and moderation. And sometimes balance means not making an even exchange. Sometimes it means not feeling guilty about an occasional splurge, as long as "occasional" doesn't turn into "frequent."

I am finding that I am more satisfied with smaller treats than I was at first: a single spoonful of dessert, a sip of wine, a small square of chocolate, a couple of tortilla chips. If my husband makes popcorn while we're watching a movie, I am now capable of eating one handful and stopping instead of suddenly realizing I've eaten half the tub. If he's having a glass of wine at a restaurant, I'll have a sip from his glass instead of ordering my own. If one of my kids is eating a bowl of ice cream, I'll ask for a spoonful instead of getting my own bowl. 

Which leads to another important point: Support from those around me! In the past, if my husband made popcorn and I said I didn't want any, he'd make me a bowl anyway - and I'd eat it, and enjoy it. But now, if I decline, that's it, no sharing unless I ask. Sometimes he'll even skip having any himself, so I won't be tempted. When he cooks, he'll give me a smaller serving without my asking. Both my kids are willing to let me have a bite of their dessert without complaint so I don't need to order a whole serving for myself. And I've gotten innumerable compliments and supportive comments from friends and family who've been following my journey in person or online. Being the kind of person who thrives on external validation, that outside support is invaluable to me. I'm doing this for me, and I can see and feel the difference, but it's a huge reinforcement to know that others can see it, too. 

Quote for the Week:

Success is the sum of small efforts,
repeated day-in and day-out. 

-Robert Collier

You Can't Just Give (It) Up: Week 7 Check-In

Last week's plateau was frustrating, but the upside was that it inspired me to not only hang in there, but to look more closely at what I was doing and to consider if I needed to change anything. Looking back over my "treats" for the week, I realized I had gotten a little lazy about trading off when I opted for a treat. It also made me think about whether I really needed those treats as often as I was taking them. So I was more stringent this week about making sure that I gave up a rough equivalent of every treat I chose, as well as simply having fewer (and smaller) treats. And boy, did it make a difference. Once I waited out that plateau, I more than made up for the week of minimal loss. 

In addition to being more careful of my tradeoffs, I was more careful about my portion sizes, which I realized had been gradually and sneakily increasing. Since I don't weigh or measure my portions, those changes aren't really reflected on my tracking chart, so it's something I have to consider carefully at every meal. It's harder for me to control when I don't have a black-and-white record in front of me to look back at, so it's very easy to slip back into old habits. 

Interestingly, after the first week or two, I haven't felt especially hungry during the day, or overly tempted to snack between meals (well, most of the time, anyway). But when I sit down for the one "real" meal I have every day, dinner with my family, it's still sooooo very tempting to pile the food on my plate. Or to go back for seconds. Or to grab that roll with butter. 

It reminds me of the saying, "Eating is the one vice you can't give up cold turkey." We all have to eat. Food, in some form and in some amount, is necessary for life. You can't just stop eating altogether, the way you can give up cigarettes, or alcohol, or gambling. You can't simply remove the temptation from your existence. And controlling something is often far more difficult than eliminating it. Think about a bag of chips: it's so much easier to not have any chips than it is to eat one and then stop. 

Once again, for me it comes down to "mindfulness": Since I'm usually the one putting food on my own plate, I have to think, as I'm serving myself, about how much food I really need. What is a reasonable portion size? How much do I need to satisfy my body, not necessarily my taste buds or my emotional desires? I have to think about how much I want the immediate satisfaction of a few extra bites vs. the long-term satisfaction of lower weight and better health. Fortunately, the more weeks go by and the more pounds I shed, the more I am realizing that long-term satisfaction in the short term. My clothes fit better right now. I like what I see in the mirror right now. My blood pressure readings are lower right now. My back pain is less right now. As I'm putting food on my plate, I can think about those right now results and remind myself of the benefits I'm already seeing. Which makes it easier, but still not exactly easy. 

The bottom line for me this week is, I think, remembering that I'm not giving up anything altogether, I'm simply limiting some things. Which reminds me to enjoy them when I'm having them, as well as encouraging me to avoid (or minimize) them when I need to. 

Quote for the Week:

 Moderation. Small helpings.
Sample a little bit of everything.
These are the secrets of happiness and good health.

-Julia Child

The Dreaded Plateau: Week 6 Check-In

Welp, I knew it would happen: the dreaded diet plateau. I didn't think it would happen quite this soon, but here it is. 

I can't complain; the first 10 pounds came off unexpectedly quickly and easily. But I thought I'd have another couple of weeks before I stalled out. The scale has been bouncing around 166.5-167.5 all week, with a taunting low of 164.4 (admittedly, after a bout of illness resulting in some degree of dehydration) and a frustrating high of 167.8 (admittedly, after an early Valentine's Day celebration involving a cocktail, wine, and dessert). 

The question most people ask when they hit a plateau is, "Should I do something different? Do I need to cut something else out of my diet to kickstart my weight loss back into gear?" But I decided before I even started changing my habits that I would simply ride out any plateau that I hit. I feel like this eating plan is stringent enough that sticking with it will eventually result in continued weight loss. Could I give up a few more things for a week or two? Sure. I could drink my coffee black all week; I could pass up all alcohol; I could avoid all treats. But that goes against my overall concept of an eating plan that I can live with long-term. I want to be able to enjoy my coffee the way I like it, to have a cocktail or a glass of wine a few times a week, to eat a cookie or a roll with butter or a bowl of creamy coup now and then. I'd rather lose the weight more slowly using a method I can stick with forever than to lose it quickly giving up foods that I love (albeit only temporarily) but then put it back on once I go back to aless stringent long-term eating plan.

So although this period is frustrating, I'm continuing to look at the big picture. I'm eating more healthy, which is great for my blood pressure and my overall health. I've already lost more than 10 pounds, which is great for my joint health, my asthma, and my physical appearance. I've been able to stick to my eating plan, which is great for my self-confidence, determination, and long-term expectations. 

What's the bottom line for my reaction to this plateau? I'm going to make sure that I'm making tradeoffs when I have a treat. I'm going to remind myself that this is not a "quick fix" plan. I'm going to look in the mirror and tell myself that I'm doing great, and looking and feeling better than I did six weeks ago. And I'm going to hang in there and keep to my plan. 

Quote for the Week: Everyone plateaus.
What you do next is what counts.  

-Noah Kagan

Focusing on the Food: Week 5 Check-In

After five weeks of changing my eating habits and just over one-third of the way to my goal weight, I've discovered one of the most important - and most pleasurable - aspects of this eating plan: It reminds me to really enjoy my food. To focus on what I'm eating. To savor each bite. 

As much as I hate the word "mindfulness," this eating plan has made me realize that I need to eat mindfully. I had never noticed how often I do other things while I eat, so instead of enjoying the snack I thought I was craving, I just shove food into my gob while focusing on something else. I'd sit on the couch with a bag of tortilla chips and eat them while I caught up on e-mail, or worked a crossword puzzle, or watched a movie, and suddenly I'd look down to find that half the bag was gone but I didn't even remember eating it. The point of tortilla chips is not nutrition, it's pleasure, and I had completely cheated myself out of the pleasure of eating them because I wasn't paying attention. Now, if I want tortilla chips, I put a small handful on a plate, close the bag and put it back in the cupboard, then I eat them one at a time, focusing on the delicious saltiness, the crunch, the flavor. I savor each chip. I enjoy eating that small serving of chips much, much more than I used to enjoy eating half the bag. 

It's the same with eating meals. The point here is a combination of nutrition and pleasure, but taking the time to consider the amount I need to eat in order to get the proper amount of nutrition reminds me that the pleasure of eating is also limited. Knowing that I don't get a second serving even if it's really delicious encourages me to enjoy the serving in front of me. So I eat more slowly in order to savor the tastes and textures, with the result that my stomach has more time to register that I'm full, so I feel more satisfied with a smaller portion. Win-win!

Are there times when I just want to shovel a giant pile something delicious into my face? Yes! Are there tough days when I want to knock back that cocktail like a western hero in a saloon with a shot of whisky? Also yes. But the pleasure is over too quickly when I do that. I'm learning that prolonging that enjoyment without adding unnecessary calories is actually more pleasurable. 

And speaking of more pleasurable, I've also reached the point where my clothes are fitting noticeably differently - and I've been able to wear some clothes that were uncomfortably snug (or unwearable) before I started this journey. I even shrunk out of a belt and into one I haven't worn in ages. I'm changing my habits primarily for health reasons (I have several medical conditions that are significantly impacted by carrying even a few extra pounds), but the side effect of looking better is a positive motivator. 

The bottom line is that there are a number of factors that are making my new habits easier to stick with. Visible results is one; more enjoyment in eating is another. Isn't it funny how eating less but eating differently can be more satisfying rather than less? Focus on your food!

Quote for the Week: The more you eat, the less flavor; the less you eat, the more flavor. 

- Chinese Proverb

10-Pound Milestone: Week 4 Check-In

I started my weight loss journey on January 7, at a nearly all-time high weight of 178.6 pounds. Four weeks in, weighing in at 168.6 pounds, I am excited to share that I have hit the 10-pound mark! I am also excited to share that my weight loss "regimen" has begun to feel natural and normal. In other words, I'm not spending all my time thinking about food.

That definitely was not true the first week or two of this diet. My inner monologue when I started usually went something like this, "There's a box of cookies over there on the kitchen table. I would like a cookie. I would REALLY like a cookie. I probably shouldn't have a cookie. But a week ago, I'd have eaten 3 cookies, so if I only eat one, I've still cut my intake by 2/3! Naw, I'll be good. But I REALLY want a cookie..." and on and on. The cravings were not just cravings, they were CRAVINGS. I mean, they were cray-cray cravings. I had to consciously and actively distract myself from food to avoid driving myself crazy. 

But I soon discovered that the less I ate those tempting treats, the less I wanted to eat them. Refusing to give in and eat that cookie the first time made it easier to not give in to the cookie the second time. The reverse was also true: when I DID give in and eat the cookie - or drink the larger glass of wine, or order the dessert or appetizer, or eat that piece of bread - it was harder not to give in the next time. Progress begets progress! The more I resisted, the less effort it took to continue resisting. Now my inner monologue is much more along the lines of, "I want a cookie. Eh, maybe tomorrow."

I have no doubt that as time goes on, there will be days when I fall off the wagon. I've had a few of those so far, although to be fair they've mainly been planned days of celebration that I have tried to compensate for on days before and after (with varying levels of success). If you look at my weight tracking, you can easily figure out my splurge days by the upward "blips" in the descending curve. And that's okay! Those splurge days remind me both how quickly the overindulgence in treats shows up on the scale and that it's easier to stick to my day-to-day eating plan when I know that I'm not completely eliminating any of my favorites from my diet. For me, planning and compensating for those treats makes skipping them the rest of the time tolerable. 

My plan from the beginning of this journey was to find a way of eating that I could maintain long-term, that would not completely eliminate my favorite foods, but that would help me develop awareness and self-control in my eating habits. I also wanted a plan that could be reasonably modified to transition from a weight-loss plan to a maintenance plan that I would be able to stick with for, well, the rest of my life. I realize that at only 4 weeks in, I can't be certain that things won't change, but as of right now, I feel like being conscious of what I'm eating (and drinking), considering "trade-offs" whenever I feel the need to splurge, and keeping an eye on my portion sizes is a system that will work for me long-term. Hopefully at some point I won't need to write down everything I eat, but it's good to know that if my weight starts to creep back up again, I have an easy way of keeping myself accountable that really works for me. 

Bottom line? It's going well, but if I start to plateau or creep back, it won't be the end of the world. I can see that those blips don't change the general trend of heading towards my goal weight. 

Quote of the week: It's not about perfect, it's about effort.
And when you bring that effort every single day,
that's when transformation happens. - Jillian Michaels 

Dieting & Trade-Offs: Week 3 Check-In

My current weight is 171 pounds even (it went as low as 170.4, but bounced back a bit). Nearly eight  pounds down is not bad for 3 weeks in! 

Here's what I've learned this week: When you have a food-related event coming up, it's best to plan ahead. I've developed a system of exchanges that allows me "treats," but it works best for me if I don't restrict those exchanges to a single 8-hour eating period. Let me explain.

First of all, I call these splurges "treats" rather than "cheats" because a "cheat" implies that you're going outside of your diet plan. My personal diet plan incorporates "treats" as an expected part of my eating. If I thought I could never eat a chocolate-chip cookie or drink a sugar-laden cocktail ever again, my diet plan would never work. But knowing that I can enjoy "treats" within reason makes my plan a lot more manageable for me. Here's how I handle treats: I plan a trade-off for each treat. For example, if I decide I want an iced coffee from Dunk's, I figure I should give up one of my 3 weekend cocktails. Do I want that iced coffee more than I want that lemon drop martini on Friday night? Sometimes the answer is yes, and sometimes it's no. But it makes me conscious of the choices that I'm making. A lot of commercial diet plans restrict your total calories by the day, so if I wanted that iced coffee on Thursday, I'd need to give up something else on Thursday so my total caloric intake for that day would be under a certain arbitrary amount. I find that thinking about my food intake over a longer period of time, such as a week, is much more manageable. I already have weekend cocktails built into my plan, so that's an obvious choice to give up. But sometimes I might feel like, "Eh, I don't need a whole serving of mashed potatoes with dinner tonight", or "I'm going to drink my coffee black today and then have a mug of sweet hot cocoa when I get home from work," or even "I'm not that hungry today but I really want a cookie so that cookie will be my whole lunch." 

This works especially well when my schedule calls for food-related events. Over the past week or so, I had two big social events involving food: a (very) belated Christmas party with friends, and a women's potluck event at my church. For the first event, I planned ahead by skipping breakfast (which I frequently do anyway; I find my morning energy level is not much different when I have two pieces of toast than when I only have coffee) and having a handful of cashews as a late lunch. I also planned out ahead of time what my limits were: I would eat small servings of anything I wanted, I would eat slowly and stop when I was full, and I would limit myself to one cocktail and one (small) glass of wine, or two glasses of wine. Similarly, for the potluck event, I ate less than usual during the day, and then allowed myself to have a sample of everything, but promised myself not to go back for seconds of anything. In addition, I planned to skip my usual cocktail on either Friday or Saturday. In fact, I ended up not having a cocktail both nights, because I simply didn't feel a particular need to have one! In both situations, I really enjoyed everything I ate, and I didn't feel like I was being overly restricted. Over the course of the week, my food intake balanced out quite well. 

I've never been good at counting calories, and I could never be bothered with weighing my food to calculate exactly what my caloric intake is, or to make exact trade-offs. But it's not really meant to be about a perfectly even exchange. It's about being aware of what I'm eating and making conscious decisions rather than eating out of habit or convenience. By consciously swapping out foods that I know are richer, sweeter, or fattier than is good for me, I can keep things reasonably in balance. Is the number of calories in a "glug" of half and half (I have no idea how many tablespoons are in a "glug," nor do I care) roughly equal to the cookie I traded it for? Not a clue, but simply considering the exchange made me think about how badly I wanted that cookie. I've surprised myself at how often, when I stop and think about whether I want to eat something, I find that I don't, or at least I don't mind skipping it. As I mentioned last week, I added a column to my spreadsheet listing temptations I've resisted (this week that column includes a burger and fries, seconds on dinner, tortilla chips, a stop at Dunkin Donuts, an entire dessert tray, a Saturday night cocktail, and breakfast from McDonald's), which is a real encouragement to me, particularly when I give in to a treat - yes, I'm splurging, but look how many times recently I would have splurged but decided not to merely because I stopped to think about it. This week I also added a column for treats that I enjoyed - not to shame me for eating sugar and fat, but to remind me that I can still have "unhealthy" foods in moderation. It's easier for me to resist that cookie when I look at my spreadsheet and remember that I just had a cookie (or an iced coffee, or a handful of tortilla chips, or pancakes with syrup, or a midweek glass of wine) a couple of days ago. 

One aspect of my diet plan that doesn't really fit in my spreadsheet is portion size. As stated above, I can't be bothered to weigh or measure each serving I eat, but I am avoiding seconds and trying to take smaller portions, especially of carb-heavy sides like potatoes and rice. In addition, I'm avoiding add-ons like bread or rolls, appetizers, and even sauces and condiments. It's amazing to me how quickly those calories add up. A dinner roll with butter can run 200 to calories; a dollop of sour cream is 30 calories, half and half and sugar are 60 calories, a single cocktail is 200-300 calories, and two slices of bread with butter is a whopping 350 calories! But on the flip side, what about treats? A single Oreo cookie is about 50 calories, a whole apple is 100 calories, a couple of tablespoons of hummus is 50 calories. So sensible trade-offs can really have an effect on my overall calorie intake, especially when judged over the course of a week!

I'm sure that I'll continue to tweak my plan as time goes on, and I have no doubt I will hit slower periods and plateaus in my weight loss journey, but by my calculations, if I can keep this trend going I'll be able to hit my goal weight of 150 pounds in about 9 more weeks, or by mid-April. Which, since I'm aiming for reaching that goal by my nephew's wedding in early July, gives me lots of wiggle room. But so far, it seems like not only an attainable goal, but a way of eating - and thinking about eating - that I can sustain in the long term, and not just while I'm actively working on losing weight. We'll see how it goes!

Quote for the week: "Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health." ~ Julia Child

I'm a Little Less Fat: Week 2 Check-In

I'll admit that I'm actually a little surprised to be seeing results already, but there is a distinct downward trend in my weight. The past few days have been consistently in the 173.5-174.5 pound range, which means I've lost roughly 4 pounds in two weeks. Hooray!

Looking back at my initial post, here's how each of the parts of my diet and exercise plan have been working out:

• Drink less alcohol. I've been good about all aspects of this part so far. I've limited myself to a single drink only on weekend days only. We went out for dinner last night and I opted for just a cocktail and no wine (okay, I had one sip of my husband's wine), which is definitely a change to my usual routine. I've been successful in cutting my at-home cocktails with seltzer to reduce the alcohol and therefore the calorie content. On nights when I'm not drinking, I'll sometimes have flavored seltzer in a cocktail glass with a fancy garnish so I don't feel like I'm missing out. Starting this week, I'm going to continue cutting back by limiting myself to alcohol only on Fridays and Saturdays, with the occasional exception for going out to dinner, which I'll continue to limit to either a cocktail or wine, not both. 
• Shrink portion sizes. This aspect is a little harder to gauge. I'm certainly making an effort. There are some meals where this is easier to do than others. For example, when we had pork chops the other day, I naturally served myself a whole pork chop (which I then ate in its entirety). But when we had chicken fried rice, I served myself a smaller portion than I normally would. I still struggle with overdoing it on the carbs, especially bread. My family loves bread, and I love baking bread, so I don't want to remove it from our menus; I just need to work harder at resisting the temptation to eat the whole batch all at once. 
• Drink more water. This has been a mixed result, mainly based on my schedule, When I'm at home, I keep a mug of water nearby at all times. I use the "measured fill" function on the water dispenser in the fridge to drink in 16-ounce increments. Somehow it's easier to think of drinking a mug of water several times a day than it is to look at the larger (32-ounce) jug I bring to work - when I remember - and think about drinking the whole thing. I also find myself tending to drink more in the morning and less later in the day. I'd like to work on drinking more before dinner, so I'll feel fuller at dinnertime and therefore hopefully eat less. I'd also like to make more of an effort to bring water with me when I'm not at home, whether I'm at work or out running errands. 
• Walk every day. I'll be honest: this one has been a big fail. It's been too cold and snowy to go outside for walks, and I have yet to unearth the treadmill. So on days when I'm at home, my activity level is pretty much zero. On days I work, however, I have been consciously making an effort to get up and walk, even if it's as simple as keeping my laptop on one side of the room and the pieces I'm working on on the other side of the room, so I have to keep walking back and forth. It may only be 10 steps each time, but 10 steps there and 10 steps back times 80 or 100 does add up. 
• Write down all of the above. I have been faithful about keeping my spreadsheet. It has certainly made me more aware of what I eat, especially while I'm eating it - or before I choose whether or not to eat it! In addition to the original information - water intake, alcohol intake, activity level, foot eaten, and current weight - I've added a column for foods and drinks that I've resisted. My husband baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies the other day and the smell was driving me crazy. I really REALLY wanted one - just one - but I resisted, even after both my husband and my son asked if I wanted one. (My answer, both times, was, "Yes, desperately, but I'm not going to have one.") And after my son's school concert, the whole family had frappes but I didn't. Looking back at all the times I wanted some bread, or a cocktail, or a sweet treat, or a Dunks iced coffee, but chose not to have it, reminds me that I'm doing really well at resisting temptation and making healthier choices. Even choosing an apple with peanut butter for lunch instead of a PB&J is a baby step on cutting out unneeded calories. It reminds me that I'm making progress even when the scale might not reflect it. Looking back at the good choices I've made makes it easier to make good choices the next time, and the next. 
• Track my weight. Again, this isn't for everyone, especially not on a daily basis, but for me it's a daily (sometimes twice daily) reminder to keep that needle moving in the right direction. And with my app, it lets me see the general trend of my weight changes over time. 
• Blog at least once a week. Making my weight loss journey public - knowing that people will know if I'm not doing well - is a huge motivator for me. If I have a couple of extra cocktails or eat large portions or have a few desserts, I'll have to confess it publicly, or at least confess the resulting weight gain (or lack of loss). It makes me think twice before deciding to cheat (or hopefully not to cheat). 

I thought about including a mention in each blog of "cheats this week," but I realized that I don't want to think of deliberate food choices as "cheats." So instead, this week's "treats" were one Dunk's iced coffee with cream and sweetened flavoring, and an appetizer with dinner at a restaurant. Allowing myself a reward every now and then reminds me that I'm not giving up treats forever, but that I can choose to enjoy them within reason. And it encourages me to find another place to cut a few calories to balance it out. 

So as my journey continues, I plan to work on being more active, avoiding bread, continuing to reduce my portion sizes and alcohol intake, and drinking more water (especially later in the day). But so far, what I'm doing seems to be working, and it seems to be sustainable. 

Quote for the week: Your diet is a bank account. Good choices are good investments.